CoachtobeNamed$$$ said:

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My own wedding.

I flew down for the ceremony. We would take her car and drive back upstate to where I was living and working after our wedding night.
The ceremony goes fine. We have the reception at her parents house. I ask her about the car and she tells me she hid it in a neighbors garage down the street so it wouldn't get "dressed up" as I was expecting.
Things are winding down and we go outside and there's her car all dressed up. Everyone followed us out and in a jovial mood. She turns around and absolutely goes ballistic. Screaming, yelling every curse word in the book. I remember clearly everyone's mouth open in shock and their big eyes at her tirade. I was embarrassed as hell.
Marriage didn't last a year. Her own father told me months before the wedding that he felt she wanted to marry to get out of the house and the RGV. Should have listened to him.

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Um, yeah. I dated a girl from the RGV. She kicked my windshield with boots and spidered it like a body had hit it from 10 stories.

Sex was good though.

justnobody79 said:

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I went to a pandemic outdoor wedding with color coded wristbands indicating what level of comfort you had being around others, green was open to handshakes and hugs, yellow was okay with fist bumps or elbow bumps, red was no contact whatsoever

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I vaguely remember doing something like this as well? Perhaps we were at the same wedding?


This didn't happen at the wedding, but the night before. The wedding party was staying at La Torreta (margaritaville). After the rehearsal dinner, everyone was hanging out at the hotel bar and waiting for the golf carts to take all of us groomsman back to our cottage we were staying on at the golf course. While waiting the groom decides he needs to pee so he proceeds to walk outside and piss around the front door of the hotel. Next thing you know two cops proceed to handcuff him and threaten to arrest him for indecent exposure. Luckily we were able to convince them to let him go.

Fast forward 6 years or so and the groom got arrested for pissing outside the local dollar store in town. Needless to say he enjoys peeing outside instead of going inside. lol.

Cringy at my wedding. Has the maid of honor deliver an almost ten minute speech full of pauses and stories nobody got. Very damn awkward standing there having to go along just praying she'd stfu and end it.


which leads me to my next point. The speeches and toasts need to be under 2 min top. Nobody gives a **** about old stories, inside jokes, etc. Say congrats, I'm happy for you and move along.

2010, my wedding, my MIL Kanye West'd us and stopped the ceremony to read a letter to us, to the shock of everyone including the pastor.

Super Awkward....not really cringey.

Day of the wedding walked in on my wife and her mother talking.

Her mother was giving her a big speech about how regardless of the cost of the wedding she would support my wife (then fiance) backing out anytime she wanted and that leaving me at the altar was okay and that getting married young was often a mistake and that good sex didn't always necessarily mean love. I was 23. Fiance was 21.

I listened to this speech for about 5 minutes while my wife's face went ghost white. She tried to give her mother the "stop talking sign" multiple times while I stood there listening but her mother just kept talking even when my wife tried to interrupt her.

As she was wrapping up her speech, I wrapped my arms around her and gave her a big hug and told her that I appreciated how much she loved her daughter and wanted to take care of her and that I would try to do the same.

The woman literally ran from the room and refused to make eye contact with me the rest of the day.

Still married.

And that's pretty much been my MIL and my relationship ever since.

Her thinking the worst and me trying to take her bad behavior in good humor.

jwoodmd said:

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CoachtobeNamed$$$ said:

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My own wedding.

I flew down for the ceremony. We would take her car and drive back upstate to where I was living and working after our wedding night.
The ceremony goes fine. We have the reception at her parents house. I ask her about the car and she tells me she hid it in a neighbors garage down the street so it wouldn't get "dressed up" as I was expecting.
Things are winding down and we go outside and there's her car all dressed up. Everyone followed us out and in a jovial mood. She turns around and absolutely goes ballistic. Screaming, yelling every curse word in the book. I remember clearly everyone's mouth open in shock and their big eyes at her tirade. I was embarrassed as hell.
Marriage didn't last a year. Her own father told me months before the wedding that he felt she wanted to marry to get out of the house and the RGV. Should have listened to him.

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Um, yeah. I dated a girl from the RGV. She kicked my windshield with boots and spidered it like a body had hit it from 10 stories.

Sex was good though.

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Yeah, they know how to ****.

CoachtobeNamed$$$ said:

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Yeah, they know how to ****.

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The crazy ones always do!

CoachtobeNamed$$$ said:

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jwoodmd said:

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CoachtobeNamed$$$ said:

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My own wedding.

I flew down for the ceremony. We would take her car and drive back upstate to where I was living and working after our wedding night.
The ceremony goes fine. We have the reception at her parents house. I ask her about the car and she tells me she hid it in a neighbors garage down the street so it wouldn't get "dressed up" as I was expecting.
Things are winding down and we go outside and there's her car all dressed up. Everyone followed us out and in a jovial mood. She turns around and absolutely goes ballistic. Screaming, yelling every curse word in the book. I remember clearly everyone's mouth open in shock and their big eyes at her tirade. I was embarrassed as hell.
Marriage didn't last a year. Her own father told me months before the wedding that he felt she wanted to marry to get out of the house and the RGV. Should have listened to him.

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Um, yeah. I dated a girl from the RGV. She kicked my windshield with boots and spidered it like a body had hit it from 10 stories.

Sex was good though.

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Yeah, they know how to ****.

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This was a redhead Latina. Let that sink in!

Couple of stories

1. I was pretty young 10 or so when a cousin was getting married. My dad being the prankster armed up myself and another young cousin with some shoe polish etc.. to decorate the getaway car. The Bride's father had been speaking with my dad and told him what car they would be using.

Cousin and I decorate the heck out of this car. As the reception is coming to a close an older guy comes running out yelling at us. My dad saw the commotion and came over. Turns out Bride's dad pointed out step dads car and they absolutely hated each other. The step dad was pretty cool after it was discovered but the Bride's dad quickly became the most hated man at the weddding for trying to put 2 kids in the middle of their fights..

2. In college and was a groomsmen in a friends wedding. Groom was good guy from a country family, bride was from a pretty wealthy family and the bride's family wasnt too excited about the groom or the wedding.

They had a fairly well known country singer play the reception and he went out to the bars after to keep the party going. Singer is also a good friend of us and the groom and by this point pretty hammered. Not surprising some of the bride's family show up to the bar we are at. Im making small talk with the brides dad and singer walks up (he did not like the dad bc dad was kind of a dick) slaps the dad on the shoulder and says something like "holy **** can you imagine the f***** S*** the groom is doing to your daughter in that hotel room right now!" He damn near stated a fight and of course that side of the family departed.

That marriage did not last btw..

Cringy but not because it was embarrassing, but because it was sad and odd and tragic and memorable for all the wrong reasons.

Big family wedding with lots of family in attendance. The night before the rehearsal dinner the bride's father is moving tables and drops dead of a heart attack at the rehearsal dinner venue. Total bolt out of the blue.

Father of the bride ran the local funeral home and others in our family also ran funeral homes so in some ways death was no stranger. And the bride made the decision to continue with the wedding as planned.

So the rehearsal dinner goes on the next night as planned in the same room where the bride's father died the night before.

The day of the wedding an open casket wake is held in the home of the deceased. Everyone basically goes from the wake to the church for the wedding.

The next day is the funeral and the wedding participants gather again for the funeral and burial.

Memorable and sad for sure.

My crazy narcissistic ***** half sister who is nine years older was getting remarried. She reunited with a high school friend 25 years after high school. She's totally consumed by money and my parents kept her out of bankruptcy many times. So, the friend is some bug eyed nerd - my ***** sister was very pretty so you can imagine she was only going for this marriage for money. He took her on expensive trips and had friends with money so he was using them to lead her on that he was rich.

My half sister sets a wedding date with just two weeks notice and I already had an international trip for work all set up so I passed on the wedding. I was of course the bad guy for not attending on such short notice. Anyway, I knew it wouldn't last and wasn't going to change my plans. So, a year after the "marriage" my half sister has fully found out the guy is a broke ass loser. So, she treats him like ****, kicks him out, etc. He finally brings up divorce and she says, "no need for a divorce, I never turned in the final signed marriage certificate so we're not actually married". She was only going to file it once she knew he had money and then divorce him for what money she could get.

Some single guy on this board is going to ask for Rule 1 on your half-sister.

HFS that is twisted

Ghost of Bisbee said:

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HFS that is twisted

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She's done a lifetime of stuff like this. On a scale of 1 to 10 where 10 is her craziest stunt, this one is about a 5.

Tecolote said:

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Ghost of Bisbee said:

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HFS that is twisted

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She's done a lifetime of stuff like this. On a scale of 1 to 10 where 10 is her craziest stunt, this one is about a 5.

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Well now we need to know what the 10 was.

justnobody79 said:

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Tecolote said:

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Ghost of Bisbee said:

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HFS that is twisted

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She's done a lifetime of stuff like this. On a scale of 1 to 10 where 10 is her craziest stunt, this one is about a 5.

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is her name Sarah?

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No. Her name is Karen. A real life, true to the name, Karen.

Beer Baron said:

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Tecolote said:

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Ghost of Bisbee said:

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HFS that is twisted

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She's done a lifetime of stuff like this. On a scale of 1 to 10 where 10 is her craziest stunt, this one is about a 5.

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Well now we need to know what the 10 was. 10s were.

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Fify

Great. List them please.

Nephew and his new bride danced to Bad Company's "Feel Like Makin' Love" as their first dance.

Beer Baron said:

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Great. List them please.

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I'll send you her contact info if you want to experience the total nutcase. She's in her 60s and through alcoholism looks like she's 80.

Got a best man speech coming up this year. The options are:

A) Realize you are a comedic genius and can thread the needle between making everyone laugh without making fun of anyone, especially the bride/groom and parents.

B) Realize you aren't a comedic genius, get up there and say thank you all for coming, congratulate the couple, tell the bride she looks beautiful, thank the parents for putting together this day, then sit down and shut up.

I'm gonna shoot for A, my wife is gonna ask me to do B.

one MEEN Ag said:

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Got a best man speech coming up this year. The options are:

A) Realize you are a comedic genius and can thread the needle between making everyone laugh without making fun of anyone, especially the bride/groom and parents.

B) Realize you aren't a comedic genius, get up there and say thank you all for coming, congratulate the couple, tell the bride she looks beautiful, thank the parents for putting together this day, then sit down and shut up.

I'm gonna shoot for A, my wife is gonna ask me to do B.

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I strongly suggest the underlooked Option C: stand up, look the flower girl dead in the eye, and recite the middle third of Samuel Taylor Coleridge's Rime of the Ancient Mariner in a deadpan. Then set the mic down gently and walk out of the door and into the night. Cut off all future contact with everyone in the wedding party.